ADHD & Symptom Tests

“Dear 10-Year-Old Me, You Need to Know That . . .”

If you could pay a visit to your childhood self, what words of affirmation, advice, or messages of self-love would you impart?

By ADDitude Editors Verified Updated on September 30, 2024

Wisdom is the hard-won result of experience; there are no shortcuts. But if you could time travel back to speak with your childhood self, what advice would you offer that tiny, still unformed version of yourself? What lessons about living and thriving with ADHD — school, work, relationships, self-love — would you impart? What words do you most wish you’d heard to avoid some headache and heartbreak, and to find more fulfillment and acceptance?

Here, ADDitude readers reflect on ADHD life lessons learned and offer everything from practical hacks to tender compassion. Threaded together, these words form a brilliant tapestry of self-advocacy, self-empowerment, and, above all, self-love.

“Oh, love, hi there! It’s me, your 34-year-old self. I just want you to know that you are wonderful. Absolutely wonderful! I know you feel like people don’t get you and that you have to be perfect to be liked. But, cute one, you are not weird, your brain is just different and you have something we call ADHD. It’s why you sometimes lash out and why you dream for hours. It’s also why you love so many different things. I know it feels safer to hide these things with your fears, but you are hurting yourself by doing that.” — An ADDitude Reader, Netherlands

“Be kind, be kind, be kind. Especially to yourself. It will feel rebellious, maybe even dangerous, to be kind to yourself, but you must try.” — Laura, Louisiana

“You are not lazy. You are not flawed. The world is just not ready for you yet.” — Adrienne, Virginia

[Read: Birds of a Feather – The Joy of Neurodivergent Friendships]

“Take notes, drink coffee.” — Courty, Pennsylvania

“You’re not crazy — you are different. There’s this thing called rejection sensitive dysphoria. It’s real, it explains a lot of what you feel all the time, and it really freaking sucks.” — Chiara, Oregon

“Post-It notes are your friend! Write things down so you remember to do stuff!” — Lisa, Ohio

[Read: Everyday ADHD – Quirky Productivity Hacks for Easily Bored Brains]

“Tell those you trust about how you feel. The sooner you tell someone, the sooner someone can help.” — Sarah, United Kingdom

“Honey, yes, you are different, but it’s a beautiful kind of different. Nothing great was ever accomplished under the umbrella of normalcy.” — Michelle, California

“Get diagnosed now.” — Karon, Colorado

“Never be quiet, keep taking up space until you get the help and support you deserve. It will be better when you’re allowed to make your own decisions.” — Mariah, Illinois

“You are irreplaceable.” — Remy, California

“Keep taking the next right step.” — Anne, Wisconsin

“You will be a great adult. Hold on until you get there.” — Michele, Texas

“Find whatever sparks joy and live your dreams as fully you possibly can.” — Deniz, Massachusetts

“Learn how to apologize.” —Paul, California

“Connect with those who thrill and want to be thrilled … then go home to calm. I have found that people like me are not the ones I like to live with.” — An ADDitude reader in New Zealand

“Don’t drink or do drugs to soothe, it makes things worse.” — An ADDitude Reader

“Choose a trade. You’re creative, enjoy working with your hands, and find satisfaction seeing the end product of your efforts.” — Matt, Canada

“There’s a reason why things that are supposed to be simple feel like they’re written in a foreign language. There are others out there who can understand, appreciate, and see the value in your own unique language.” — Jessica, Texas

“Don’t worry so much about fitting in with others. You will find your tribe along the way.” — Noreen, Oregon

“Bring a fidget everywhere.” — M., Virginia

“Become comfortable with being uncomfortable.” — Jamie, United Kingdom

“Oh, sweetheart, it’s not your fault. Your brain is built a bit differently from other people, and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad student, or a bad person. It doesn’t mean that you’re a weirdo, or unlovable, or a problem.” — Peyton, Oregon

“It’s not you, it’s the world. Keep doing your thing. It’s going to get complicated and confusing but you will develop some amazing strategies and skills to manage it, without even realizing.” — Lucy, Australia

“Learn about your brain. Teach others!” — Wendy, Canada

“Trust your gut. Pay attention to your needs; they’re not lying to you.” — An ADDitude Reader

“God has a plan for you, sweetheart. You are teary-eyed and alone right now, but I promise a whole world of amazing, creative, heart-centered people across the globe will be at a finger tip’s distance from you in the future.” — Erin, Canada

“Work hard at making nutrition, exercise, and sleep as routine and automatic as possible, to serve as a good foundation.” —Beth, Texas

“Figure out what works and what doesn’t, and then design your life around your strengths. Find a job that fires your passions, which means you’ll work hard at it. Find friends who appreciate your spontaneity without punishing you for poor planning and communication. Find a spouse who pushes you to grow as a person and loves you for your good qualities.” — Josh, Utah